Memory Minders

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Life Lemonade

This world and the people in it are not perfect. Circumstances often arise that we don’t want, wish or enjoy. What makes or breaks these moments is how we handle them. It’s not just about the unwanted times of life but how we choose to react to them.

Think back on your life so far. What has shaped you the most? Yes, the high and low moments of happiness, tragedy, success or failure are big. But digging deeper, what truly impacts us is how we choose to think, act, and move forward from those monumental events. The big moments are catalysts which cause us to react and eventually adapt.

How we react depends on how we think. How we think isn’t about intelligence or talent. Our thinking and subsequent reactions stem from our overall attitude. How do we see this world and all that’s in it? Events and people can shape our attitude but ultimately this is something we alone control.

Whether life throws us lemons or roses, what we do with them depends on our attitude. Lemon moments can either cause us to lament our plight or make some lemonade. Rose petal moments of life are often easier to take in stride. But these matter too. When life is going well, how can we share and make someone else’s day smell a little more fragrant? What we choose in every moment stems from our unique perspective.

If there’s one constant in this life, it’s change. How we deal with the changing events, people  and things that will come our way impacts not only our moments, but also how we remember them. Studies have shown those with a positive and sunnier outlook on life tend to have better memories. They adapt to the bad and embrace the good.

In this #SummerToRemember maybe you’ve experienced moments of change or had to make lemonade out of  unwanted lemons. Me too. But let’s remember that no matter what comes our way, we can always control our thoughts and actions. Our attitude determines what we think, say, and do. If we keep it focused on our blessings and the positives of life we can make any batch of lemons into lemonade.

So what will it be-sour lemons or refreshing lemonade? Choose to see the positives in any situation, especially the sour ones. Let’s choose to be creative and understand what we can learn or how we can grow from the unwanted or challenging experiences of life.

When we shift from problems to finding solutions and learning from life’s lemon moments, we engage our brain, think differently, and ultimately help our memories. So as summer wanes and we sip our lemonade, let’s remember how lemonade begins-with sour lemons. Any situation can be made into a memorable moment simply by shifting our attitude. That seems like a much better way to live while making it a #SummerToRemember.

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Elusive Sleep

Ahh sleep-refreshing, rejuvenating and elusive? Our heads hit the pillow after a long day and we just want to relax. We collapse, find that comfortable spot and drift to dreamland, right? Wrong. For many people, especially those who are older, sleep becomes more elusive with age. Scientists and the medical community are educating us all on the importance of sleep for our bodies and brains. So how can we sleep well?

This generation is trending toward less sleep than many before it. Technology advances, never ending options for entertainment and commerce, fear of missing out, bodily changes as we age, are all reasons to explain why we are sleeping less. Sleep plays a pivotal role in our body and mind wellness, yet the processes aren’t fully known.

One things researchers do know about sleep is that is provides a virtual rewind and organizational component to brain and memory wellness. When we get enough sleep, these brain functions occur naturally and assist memory. When we don’t, things get backed up and just like a messy desk or an overgrown garden, it takes longer to be more efficient in our efforts the next day.

We know we need to sleep in order to function well in mind and body, yet our actions don’t always fit our wishes. I’m a perfect example.

I need at least seven hours of sleep to function optimally but that is a rare occurrence. Getting up early for school, work or summer events, carving out a bit of quiet time for myself and/or being so used to getting up early I can’t sleep late anymore are a few of the reasons why I often don’t make that seven hour mark.

My fitness tracker also monitors my sleep and sometimes I catch up a bit on weekends, but my average sleep amount still usually falls short of those refreshing seven. And I feel it. Some days I’m just not physically or mentally sharp due to my lesser sleeping time. Getting to bed and sleep sooner is always a goal and I have made a dent.

My bedtime goal is earlier than it used to be. I’ve learned to manage the thoughts that sometimes make falling asleep difficult. I’ve adjusted my diet, our bedroom and our bed to make them more conducive to sleep. My motivation is not only to keep my body refreshed but also my brain and memory.

So here are a few tips that can help us to grab even just a few more moments of precious sleep:

  1. Keep a regular bedtime and wake schedule. Your body will then automatically sense when it’s time to sleep and awaken more naturally.
  2. Keep your bedroom about sleep. Don’t exercise, eat, watch TV, scroll the internet or be on any other electronic device before trying to get some sleep. Eliminating these things sets the tone to wind down and relax.
  3. Let go of what threatens the drift-off factor. Whether it’s thoughts, worries, moving around, or loud noises adjacent to your bedroom, let them go. Write down or pray about worries or things to do, find a comfy spot and try to stay there and control the noise. These will assist you to drift into dreamland more easily.
  4. Control your evening actions. Don’t exercise or eat a big meal. Don’t consume alcohol or caffeine right before bedtime. All of these can interfere with a more natural wind down time in the evenings.
  5. Work on what you can and when all else fails, talk to your doctor. There are many things we can control but if you’ve tried them all, see if your doctor has another solution. Maybe it’s adjusting your medications or trying another sleep producing alternative, but seek professional help if necessary.

Quality sleep is paramount in our efforts toward wellness in our body and mind. If we truly want to savor these last moments in our #SummerToRemember, we need to get enough sleep. See if these help with your sleep and overall memory and let’s remember our summer moments well!

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The Impact of Sneaky Stress

It sneaks up like a preying lion and suddenly hits. Out of nowhere we bark at our loved ones with short tempers. Or even more subtle, it simmers slowly as we gradually gain weight and/or lose sleep, our thoughts and interest in things we once loved. Stress takes a toll on us physically and mentally and often we aren’t aware until something snaps.

We all can quote the physical ramifications of unmanaged stress: high blood pressure, ulcers, heart disease and stroke to name just a few. But often what goes unnoticed is the mental impact of ongoing or acute stress. Sleeplessness leads to memory loss. Worrying and multitasking lead to forgetfulness and indecision. The ramifications of stress on our brain and memory are ongoing and long lasting.

When the brain is under stress, it quickly decides what’s important and minimizes the energy given to lesser things. What used to come naturally and easily is suddenly difficult. Deciding what to make for dinner or balancing the checkbook become monumental tasks. It impacts every area of our lives, whether we realize it or not.

It would seem eliminating all stress to protect our brains and bodies would be the logical answer. But in reality that’s not possible and some stress is actually healthy and keeps us moving forward in life. So how do we manage and balance what’s good from what’s unhealthy? That’s up to each of us. But here are a few stress management techniques that can help when stress sneaks up:

Find your happy place. This is a reflective exercise we do in our minds when stress invades and threatens to steal our joy. Identify a place, real or imagined, where you are entirely comfortable and happy. Then, when feeling stress rise, go there on a mind mini-vacation! Imagine how it feels there, take a deep breath and be enveloped in warmth, happiness and love. It can literally lower blood pressure, heart rate and take our minds off the stressful situation we are experiencing. Try it-it works!

Breathe. Most any situation can accommodate a few seconds for a deep breath (or two or three). This gives us a moment to deliver additional oxygen to our brains, think more clearly and make good decisions. It’s so easy to react or speak in the immediacy of a stressful moment, but those aren’t always our best decisions. Instead, take a few seconds to breathe, think, decide and then speak or act.

Pray. Often when taking those deep breaths, I’m silently praying as well. It helps me to let go of the stress, remember what’s most important in each situation, and draw upon inner strength.

Do what you can do and let go of the rest. No one can do everything. The best we can do is what only we can do-control our own thoughts and actions. Do what you can do, in the best way you can and then let go of the rest. Preparation and accepting help from others when needed can help in this area. (More on these in another post.)

Try these techniques and see if managing and balancing the stresses of life help you remember more. Summer can be a time when we don’t think as much about stress. But just like that preying lion, it can sneak up and hit us or simmer below the surface before boiling over. Let’s manage stresses as they come and we’ll make even more memorable moments this #SummerToRemember.

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Step into the Uncomfortable!

Step out of your box, your comfort zone and go beyond what’s easy. I teach and advocate this but at times find it difficult to do myself. We all prefer familiar and what doesn’t require much effort, but that WILL NOT strengthen our mind and memories. The comfy way doesn’t create the cognitive reserve which will help us to utilize our brains to their best capacity when older. It’s time to use not just the familiar, but stretch and grow into the unfamiliar. It’s time to use our whole brain!

Summertime is a time to reflect, relax and rejuvenate. Up until a bout a week ago, for me it was anything but these. It felt like a sprint and I was just trying to keep it all going and manage well. I fell into patterns and routines that were tried and true and would help me function well. There’s nothing wrong with this approach and it was beneficial for that time. However, now that patterns are changing and I have a few moments to breathe, it’s time for something new.

How we learn and take in information best varies for each of us. I like visual and auditory, prefer routines and organization. But there are also times to use my hands, be spontaneous and go with the flow. Summer is a great time to experiment and step out of our natural, preferable routines and try something new. When we do this, we activate parts of our brain that may be underutilized in our normal patterns of behavior. We use our whole brain not just the dominant part, which will be extremely important as we age.

Here’s a quick example-grab a pen, go ahead, right now-grab a pen.

Which hand did you grab it with? I bet it was with your dominant hand-the one you write with and do most things. Now grab that pen with the other hand-feels different doesn’t it? Now write your name with your non-dominant hand. Not so easy? Our left and right brains work differently, yet together. Patterns of behavior and our natural tendencies dictate which side becomes a bit more dominant. But that doesn’t mean it’s the only side we should use!

The more we use the non-dominant side of our bodies, it causes us to think differently. To write with our non-dominant hand we have to really think about how to make every letter. It’s like learning to write all over again. But we can do it, it just takes a different set of impulses to relay the information to that side of our body. Simply by using that other hand, we activate all kinds of brain cells in different ways. It’s similar to using different muscles-when we first use them, they can be sore and feel clumsy. But the more we use them, the easier the motion and the more we strengthen them.

Now we can take this same concept and apply it to how we manage our days, what we choose to do, and how we act and think.  It can be as simple as picking up a pen with the other hand to changing our entire approach or outlook. Whatever we do to use the lesser utilized parts of our brain inevitably strengthens those areas. This allows us to use these areas more as we age. The use it or lose it adage totally applies here. Use these areas of your brain now to not lose them later!

So are you with me? Let’s use our whole brain starting this #SummerToRemember and step out, be a bit uncomfortable and start an adventure of using ALL of our brain. It will surely help us all make our summer moments memorable!

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Unforgettable Moments

The air is thick with moisture and we sense it’s coming. Clouds build, the smell of rain envelopes, sunlight dims, and the flags are whipped by the wind. Thunder cracks and lightning flashes as we run for the nearest escape from the sideways water pelting our skin. The storm descends before we reach shelter and completely drenches us.

A sudden, intense summer storm wreaked havoc on my daughter’s golf tournament last week and its impact was with us the rest of the day. As she golfed and I watched in our soaked clothing, the sensory experience is one I’ll never forget. I love the heightened sensations of a summer storm, but prefer to enjoy it from inside, not outside! But the sights, sounds, smells, and feel of that particular storm will always be a memorable moment in my #SummerToRemember.

Our five senses of vision, hearing, smell, touch and taste help us to understand, navigate and remember the world around us. It’s said when one sense is diminished in one way, the others compensate. That is true, but we all can work to increase awareness of our sensory world and in the process, assist our memories of it.

I recently had a memory flash filled with emotion and sensory stimuli. Seeing a similar situation unfold sparked the same emotions and feelings from years ago. Emotions and memories are tightly interwoven. Often what prompts and helps form memories is initiated from our senses.

So let’s pay attention to our senses and help our memories along the way. Here a few tips to be more present in our sensory world to assist in making our moments memorable:

  • Notice the little things around you. The smells, sensations in our surroundings, tastes, or visual landmarks and cues–sensory stimuli are endless if only we notice them.
  • Connect what we’re experiencing from our senses to the moment. The sweetness of the birthday cake, the familiar songs and the annoying bugs at the outdoor concert, or the rumbling thunder of an approaching storm are forever associated with that event. Connect the sensory input and you’ll have a trigger for the memory.
  • Replay the moment. Whether it’s telling the story, reviewing  it in our mind or writing it down, the repetitive nature of replaying it cements the memory.
  • Watch for triggers and notice their impact. Some sad or painful memories are often cued by our senses. Pay attention and manage their impact to learn and grow.

Noticing the sensory world and connecting moments will assist our memories. While it may not have been fun to be caught in a sudden storm, it certainly created an unforgettable moment. Take time in this #SummerToRemember to slow your pace and smell the roses (or the rain). Pay attention to all your senses to enjoy every moment as it turns into a memory.

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