Memory Minders

Stimulating Enrichment Services
to Enhance Memory & Wellness

Your Future Brain Will Thank You!

We don’t think about exercising our brains as much as our bodies, but we should.

In order to age well, we not only need to take care of our bodies, but also pay attention to maintaining our brains, too. Studies have shown those who stay mentally engaged retain cognitive function longer than those who don’t exercise their minds. This week in our #SummerToRemember series, let’s explore ways to stay mentally sharp.

How do you exercise your brain? In our middle years, we have numerous mental challenges bombarding our brains all day long. We long for the day when we can physically and mental relax a bit in retirement. But that attitude can lead to golden years of lackluster cognitive function. In order to have sharp minds now AND later, we need to stimulate our minds daily, no matter our age.

Retirees may feel they deserve a break-as well they do. However, if we choose to not engage in mentally challenging activities as we age, we will lose the ability to think and function at a high level. It’s the ‘use it or lose it’ adage that applies to both physical and mental ability. When we exercise our brains, we then have more brain power to call upon when needed. It’s that simple.

When life shifts into retirement or a different season of life, how can we continue to challenge ourselves? By being creative!

Daily life offers a plethora of choices and options to stimulate our minds, but are we capitalizing on them? Whether it’s working, raising a family, juggling both children and parents, caring for grandchildren, or just managing our aging lives, we all have choices. How we choose to spend our time truly matters.

Are we engaging mentally in something that stimulates our brains or do we choose easier, more passive ways of spending our days? Are we using our time wisely or taking the path of least resistance to just get by? What we choose will make a difference in our mental capacity later in life. If we always choose the easy path and don’t challenge ourselves mentally, we’ll have less ability to do so later.

Let’s pick the road less travelled as Robert Frost put it. Let’s do simple things like take a different route or figure it out without relying on GPS. Let’s do the math in our head instead of using a calculator. Let’s create a new recipe instead of making the same old thing for dinner. Let’s try a new game, read a different type of book, join a new club or make a new friend. All these simple choices can make a world of difference in how our brain functions now and when we’re older.

The added benefit of challenging ourselves mentally is the good feelings it evokes. Trying something new or different feels uncomfortable at first. But after a while, we settle in, find our groove and eventually can take pride in even attempting something outside our box. Endorphins are released and happier, more satisfying feelings result. WIN, WIN, WIN!!

Give it whirl. Try something new, step out of your normal routine and stimulate your brain more than usual. Do it today, tomorrow and the next day so your future self will thank you.  Make it a #SummerToRemember by challenging yourself mentally!

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Celebrating with Dementia

If you know or love someone experiencing dementia symptoms for any reason, you’ve had to make many tough decisions. When to have them stop driving, manage finances, and live alone are some of the biggest. But it’s also the myriad of small day to day decisions which also impact everyone involved. How we handle these makes a difference, not only for us and our loved ones, but also the general public.

Helping a loved one manage life while living with a disease manifesting in dementia is a long, often thankless, tiring, and frustrating role. The big milestone decisions are hopefully done while the loved one still has some moderate cognitive ability and awareness. But as the dementia and diseases progress, more of these big and little decisions get made along the way, including how to celebrate life.

This is a time of year when many family and friends gather to celebrate moms, graduations, and weddings among other events. Often the question arises about whether to include the loved one with dementia. Theories and opinions abound, but ultimately this type of day to day decision should be based on a few key factors. Above all, the well-being of the loved one with dementia should be forefront.

Here are a few factors to keep in mind when deciding how to include a loved one with dementia in celebrations.

  • Is it safe? If the venue includes stairs or another physical barrier to participating, it may create more frustration and difficulties for your loved one.
  • What’s the time frame? If it’s in the evening or another time of day when your loved one has increased confusion or behaviors, it may be best to decline. Additionally if it’s a lengthy event which could cause issues, it may be more beneficial to attend only a portion of the event if possible.
  • Who’s in charge of the loved one? If the event is being hosted by the loved one’s primary caregiver, then another trusted friend or family member or caregiver needs to be identified to be in charge. This will increase everyone’s comfort level knowing the loved one’s needs are being addressed.
  • Will it create frustration or unwanted behaviors? Change is very difficult for someone with dementia. The preparation alone can cause issues—different clothing, disruption of routine and forgetfulness. The event also has many barriers–new or additional people to engage with and remember, different food, drinks and venue etc. All of this causes stress which may lead to increasing dementia symptoms and diminished dignity of our loved one.
  • Is there an alternative way to experience the event? Sharing a video or pictures, seeing those involved in the loved one’s own environment before or after the event and/or even live videos can make our loved ones feel involved even if not physically present.

While life-changing decisions often serve as milestones of a journey, it’s the day to day choices which have the most impact. Keeping our loved one’s dignity, safety and well-being at the forefront will always make these choices a bit simpler. Typically hurt feelings about missing out or judgement can interfere with making sound choices. But it’s important to stay as objective as possible and focus on what’s best for our loved ones.

While never easy, these small choices influence all those who love someone with dementia. Weighing all factors will not only allow us to advocate for our loved one, but also create awareness of dementia’s impact on everyone involved. Ultimately, we want everyone to make memorable moments, including those with dementia.

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Honoring Traditions

“Tradition, tradition!” The lyrics of the Fiddler on the Roof song echo in our heads whenever traditions come up or need to change. We all have traditions with family, friends, coworkers or our community. They are a good way to spark memories, create new moments and have something to look forward to in our lives. But sometimes we need to change the old or adopt new traditions. This isn’t always easy, especially when memories are involved.

How we celebrate the holidays, honor someone’s birthday, and even what we do on the weekend involve tradition. Basically, traditions are habits which can be very beneficial to our memory. But when traditions change for whatever reason, it often causes stress which can lead to memory loss or difficulty.

Take how we celebrate a holiday. It doesn’t matter if it’s a fun new tradition like having Mexican food on Cinco de Mayo (coming up next weekend) or an ingrained tradition like Christmas or Hanukkah, they all have some level of importance. However, families and circumstances change and how we celebrate holidays need to adapt.  Maybe there’s a new baby’s schedule to consider or an elderly family member who can’t participate as they once did. If we can adjust our expectations and yes, even our traditions to accommodate for these normal life changes, it can make for smoother, more enjoyable times together.

Traditions are a great avenue to relive and create memories. Yet, changing them or adopting new traditions can be confusing for those with memory issues. We can help ourselves and others by cultivating change with our attitude, anticipating changes in advance, or by learning how to navigating life’s surprises as discussed the last few weeks. The definition of tradition is long established patterns of behavior, often handed down from one generation to the next. When these change by choice or circumstance, our attitude, an open mind and some planning ahead works wonders toward creating an environment conducive to creating and sustaining memorable traditions.

What traditions matter to most to you? Does changing them cause stress or are you able to adapt with ease? Change is never easy, but if we can adjust our own thoughts and attitudes toward remembering what’s most important, the change can be smooth and the traditions continued.

So as we adopt a newer tradition like eating Mexican food on Cinco de Mayo or graft another layer onto an older tradition in our lives, let’s remember why we have traditions in the first place–to make memorable moments and honor what’s important. Keeping the reasons behind the traditions in mind and adapting either the new or old to accomplish our goal will keep traditions alive.

Traditions are an integral part of our lives and a wonderful way to preserve memories. Let’s not balk at adopting new or changing old traditions if needed. They just may turn into the path toward making even more memorable moments!

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Navigating Life’s Surprises

One, two, three-SURPRISE! Have you ever been surprised?  In one way or another, we have all been surprised. It may not have been a fun party with all of our friends; instead maybe it was a surprise diagnosis, bad news or unwanted life change. How we react to and also help those with memory loss deal with life’s surprises often relies on the same choice-a positive, kind attitude.

Do you know someone who is perpetually positive? They seem to ooze happiness, no matter the situation. Many just exude a quiet confidence that all will be ok even when the worst happens. FYI-this isn’t me. My natural tendency is to worry, try to quickly fix the problem, and then worry some more about the future. But I also know this isn’t a helpful or healthy way to live. So I try to catch these tendencies when they arise and shift to a more positive, kind approach. Some days this works better than others.

Alternatively, happy surprises can also create worry or a negative reaction in some. If it’s not what was planned, even positive surprises can create strife, especially for those with memory issues. Change becomes more difficult as we age and it’s incredibly hard for a person experiencing memory problems. Any shift in the routine, especially a sudden or surprise change can cause major problems for one with dementia or memory loss. Bad reactions, acting out, and increased confusion can all be effects from simple changes or surprises.

For all of us, surprises are just that–a surprise. Most of us can take in the new situation quickly, adjust and even shift our reactions as I try to do. But for someone with memory issues, this either isn’t possible or takes much, much longer. Caregivers and loved ones may not understand and rush the process. This will only create more stress and often unwanted behaviors.  The quick decision making process we do (and often take for granted) isn’t possible for those with dementia. They react badly to surprises because they cannot comprehend what’s happening or communicate their feelings well.

So how can we help both ourselves and those with memory issues deal with the inevitable surprises of life? By adjusting our own attitudes. Instead of reacting negatively to either the surprise or a bad reaction from someone with memory loss, let’s shift our own focus toward being more kind and positive.

Here a few suggestions on how to help ourselves and those with memory loss deal with surprises of life:

  • Shift our outlook to more positive and/or gently help others to do this as well.
  • Minimize surprises for someone with memory loss by implementing slowly or prepping for the change as far in advance as possible.
  • Be patient with ourselves and others when surprises come. Change isn’t always easy. Frequent reminders about the change for those with memory loss and staying positive are integral to navigating them well. Deep breaths go a long way here.
  • Manage any bad reactions with love and kindness. Whether it’s our own or others’, sometimes responses aren’t always positive. For someone with memory loss, their bad reactions are usually the only way they can respond. Asking ourselves how we can adjust things with a loving, kind approach is what’s needed.

Surprises are a part of life. How we react to them and also help those with memory issues deal with them is important. Navigating life’s surprises with positivism, love, and kindness will not only help us adapt to those surprises, but could also assist us all to make more memorable moments.

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Cultivating Change

The sun is slowly making more of an appearance however limited it is. Its shining prompts us to think of Spring and the inevitable changes to come. Often changes in life can be stressful or not wanted. But just as we cultivate new life in Spring, we can cultivate our approach to change and use it to make memorable moments.

Regardless of whether we have a green thumb or not, it’s difficult to not appreciate the beauty of Spring. Gray and brown give way to green, yellow, and pink. Many of us try to increase the level of beauty by cultivating plants or flowers. I’m a fan of perennials and their recurring blooms and low maintenance. But it’s hard to beat show-stopping annual flowers or the bounty of a well-tended vegetable garden.

Cultivating anything worthwhile demands our time and attention. Whether it’s tending blooming flowers, luscious fruits and vegetables or nurturing a talent or gift, our focus is required. To succeed, effort is necessary and sometimes things don’t always go our way. Seasons change, mother nature intervenes, or other factors and people beyond our control impact our labors. What we do and think in these moments matters.

How we adjust and adapt to changes in something we are cultivating is important. We plan, put in time and effort and then things change. It can cause us to feel mad, sad, or even throw up our hands and give up. While it’s natural to feel emotion, in these moments one of the best things to do is persevere. Perhaps the perseverance involves waiting, changing our previous plans or even abandoning them for a different course of action. But let’s not give up, instead let’s cultivate the change.

Just as we would put time and effort into our original endeavor, the way through change is to persevere and cultivate our reactions and attitude. When change is on the horizon or even at the moment it hits us, our first responses aren’t always positive. But what if in those moments, we attempt to see what’s good about the change?

Maybe the change will open up an avenue or choice we’d never have dreamed of without it. Perhaps in the process of adapting to the change, we’ll learn new things or meet new people we wouldn’t have otherwise. Possibly this change can lead us to an even greater achievement, experience or life purpose. But none of these will happen if we don’t cultivate our reactions and attitude to see change differently.

Sometime this week, something is going to happen to change things up for us. Little things happen daily, but maybe a bigger change will occur. How will we adapt to see good in the change? Try cultivating a different response to adapt and embrace changes this week. See how it makes you and those around you feel. It’s my bet that the slight adjustment of cultivating our responses to change will help us to make even more memorable moments.

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